Desensitize the Fear of Failure

It’s a simple truth that in life some degree of failure is inevitable and that we often have to go through a great deal of failure to get the success that we want.  Now, there are some simple changes in thinking that can help.  We can choose to view it not as a failure when things don’t go our way.  We succeeded at making an attempt.  We succeeded at doing our best; and, that is better than what many people do.

But, for most people, just choosing to reframe things in a more positive light is not really enough to take the bite out of perceived failure.  I’ve got a simple exercise that you can do every day that will help.

The truth is that much of the time if you really commit yourself; if you’ve got passion, patience and persistence, then success becomes inevitable.  I like to use rolling a die until it comes up as a success to illustrate this point.  It’s easy to succeed, you just need to keep rolling the die.  You can ignore failures, you can just accept that they don’t matter, that they have no deeper meaning or significance.  You can forget about them as soon as they happen and focus on the success that is coming, that is inevitable.

I strongly encourage you to find or buy a 20-sided die and get in the habit, each day, of rolling it until you’ve gotten a couple of 20’s.  Teach your emotional self, through experience, that the failures don’t matter because if you stick with things, you will succeed.  It’s the truth; but, our emotions don’t always respond to logic and reason.  Our emotions are shaped by experience.  Give yourself the experience of knowing that all you have to do to succeed is keep rolling.  Let your mind start making connections between this exercise and other places in your life where success is inevitable, if you stick with it.

This simple exercise will help you to become more calm and patient.  It will teach you, on a deep emotional level, that persistence brings success.

I also wrote a poem called “Roll the Die” that you can use to remind yourself of this principle any time you need a little something to help you set your fears aside and just go for it.  This poem can help you reconnect with the truth that failure can’t stop you from succeeding if you don’t let it, if you remember that success is inevitable.
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Thank you for reading!

-Adam Coles-

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